Poor blog... I kinda want to revive it and devote some writing to it. Maybe I'll do that. Yeah, sounds good.
The thing is, lately I've been using my netbook for all my writing purposes. I got hundreds of documents in there, most of them being inane ramblings and journal postings... some of them are script ideas, or details concerning some stories I'd like to work on eventually. Others still are business proposals, since I had some ideas for start-ups, which are indefinitely on the back burner until I feel the proper motivation for them. Point is... almost none of it serves any purpose, I kind of doubt anyone else will ever read them. I mean, I'm not going to delete them, but, y'know, I wouldn't fret about it if they got destroyed or some such. Most of what I write about that's worthwhile sticks with me anyway, ready to be regurgitated.
This blog however, does serve a purpose... I haven't served that purpose very well, but the purpose remains, still cradled in secrecy, unknown to anyone but myself. I like that the blog is here, it's almost as if it's... calling to me... it wants me to just, y'know, do what I do best.
Whilst in San Francisco, I had an idea for a short story, a story that could only be read a certain way that I'd have to code for to make it work properly. However, in order to do the story justice, it should be thought out and outlined before I put the effort forth, because it's a vision I have. I thought to myself, well, okay, I know what I want, I just have to hammer out the details, make sure it works so I don't come across any problems later, then I just take a day and do what I need to do to make it work.
Then I kind of laughed to myself, because I knew it wasn't going to happen. I didn't have much proper motivation to write a simple short story I had a few days prior, what makes me think I'm going to put forth enough effort to code my own module and write out a pretty sophisticated story? I'm starting to know myself enough to know that if I'm not spending enough time writing regularly, that I'm not gonna just out of the blue finish some big project.
What I really should do is just... write. Every day. About whatever. Ease myself back into the fiction writing scene. More importantly than anything else... just have fun with it. Don't worry too much about it. Don't 'not write' until something amazing or worthwhile comes to mind... I mean, shee-it, I have a few dozen stories on the backburner already that I could give you the plot for right now, probably a few dozen more if I cared enough to search for them. I've been stock-piling these ideas for more than a decade, my 'magnum opus' if you will has been in the making for 14 years, and there's hundreds of smaller stories that it encompasses. Ideas aren't the problem here... motivation on the other hand... heh.
See, that's the thing though, I enjoy writing. People can comprehend what I write fairly easily, without too much struggle I hope, whatever, I'm not too worried about the readers, they're smart people, they'll figure it out. I can be conventional whenever I want, or I can entertain my more eccentric mannerisms at the drop of a hat. Writing is... enjoyable for me. I get some weird kick out of it, and I'm not sure why.
So... is there a reason I'm posting all this on this here blog? Well, yeah, not because anyone will read it, but because it's my little way of officially telling myself that I don't need to adhere to some strict standards of perfect preparation before I begin writing something, especially of something of so little consequence. If someone wants to read through my minor postings and short stories, y'know, that's great, good for them, maybe they'll learn something, but that's not why I do it. I do it because I enjoy it, and I want myself to *know* that I enjoy it, so I don't have to succumb to some irrational social anxiety about it.
Granted this blog is originally intended to be a place I hosted little short stories pertaining to the greater story of Ailsglyph... well, it still is kind of about that, but it's also something more.... something I'll probably get into at a later time.
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